There are many ways to come out, such as with classmates, friends, colleagues, and family. The difficulty and complexity of each are different due to the different relationships between them. Coming out to family is the most difficult and complicated. So I will focus on talking about some of the big and small things that happened when my boyfriend and I came out to our family. We are all family now. Let me first briefly introduce the two protagonists: I, 28, am from a small town in Sichuan, and I live and work in Guangzhou; he, 35, is from a rural area in Jiangxi (a real rural area, the nearest grocery store is several miles away), and he lives and works in Guangzhou. I met him in 2008. He was kind, considerate, tall and handsome... (cough, let's get down to business) In short, within two months, he forced me to live with him on the grounds that my residence was dirty and messy. One day not long after that, his mother came to Guangzhou to see him. Since we rented a one-bedroom apartment with only one bed, he scratched his head all day and couldn't figure out how to tell his mother. I was at work at the time, and he didn't call me in advance. It wasn't until I got home from get off work in the evening that he finally said to his mother: "I'm going to pick up a very important person (at that time he would pick me up at the bus stop every day, but…
Today I want to talk about my first love. It may not be considered a true love, but it was the first time I had emotional investment with a boy. For me, it has irreplaceable meaning in my life. It was the time before the exams in the second semester of my freshman year. The early summer sun was getting hotter and hotter. A senior in my senior year invited me to his rental house. I didn’t know anything and I was new to the circle, so I went there without thinking. Of course, the senior wanted to have sex. At that time, I thought that men only had sex. I never thought that two men could fall in love with each other, let alone get married and live together. At that time, I thought that two men having sex was driven by desire, which was sinful and dark, but it attracted me. I went to the senior classmate's place. He was not my type, a little bit effeminate. I thought he should be a 0, but he wanted to find me, a 0. I couldn't understand it. We chatted and watched TV. I had no intention of having sex with him, nor did I want to leave. At that time, I just wanted to stay with him and didn't want to go back to the dormitory. The senior classmate didn't want to chase me away, and he couldn't satisfy his desire, so he called his "brother" to come over. His brother is a 1, a pure 1, which means…
In early summer of 2009, I graduated from college. Fortunately, in this era, when many people were still worried about finding a job, I was lucky enough to pass the civil service exam. During the summer vacation, the last two months of vacation, I used it to play a huge joke on life because I entered the circle. By accident, after graduation, my class monitor and I went to see our counselor, mainly to collect our diplomas. Along the way, the squad leader talked to me about gay things. When I got home, I went online to the forum and added QQ. From then on, I started to hang out in this circle. After surfing the Internet for two months, I came to this city on the last day of August. And met him now. This way of getting to know each other is probably commonly used by many gays. I first saw him on QQ. I don’t know when he added me, but when I was bored and looking through my QQ friends from beginning to end, his photo attracted me. I went into his space and saw a lot of his photos. Indeed, I believe that anyone who likes men will definitely like him. He is mature, handsome and charming. It’s a pity that my thoughts were too simple at the time, otherwise so many things would not have happened later. I will talk about these things later. yes? Am I no exception? As soon as I saw him, I was attracted to him. The feeling of a…
It's been a year since I graduated, and I just want to use this text to commemorate our feelings, sometimes I miss him very much, but I'm afraid to disturb him, and I don't know what to do...... When he was in college, he and I weren't in the same class, but he used to come to our dorm to play because one of us was a fellow of his country. When I first entered the university, I was very reserved, and I was generally more Sven, and I let go after I got acquainted. I'm an introverted guy with a bit of shyness, and sometimes a bit headstrong. He is an athletic boy with a hearty personality and a dimple when he laughs, which is very sexy. He played basketball very well, joined the varsity team, played defense, and later won the championship of the varsity competition. I'm a basketball idiot, and I usually only like to play table tennis and badminton, which are not too strenuous sports. Later, I also learned some shooting moves in physical education class, and when I happened to hit a few heads during practice, they praised me for my basketball talent. I just laughed, and with my size, I still knew what I could do. But he was still very happy in his heart, so he said provocatively: Let's compete, whoever loses will have dinner. I'm one-on-one with him, and if I hit one before he shoots 10 balls, I win. I know he's provoking me, but I think he's too arrogant, although…
The knocks on the door kept ringing. Jian Xiaoning seemed to sense impatience, so he shouted, "I'm coming..." while trying to open the door as quickly as possible. But he couldn't be quick, because he had just learned to use crutches, and he always felt uncomfortable using them, and his walking was very awkward. Finally, he reached the door and looked out through the peephole. There was a boy holding a snack box standing outside. He knew that this was the waiter from the "Aegean Sea Pastry Shop" who had brought him the egg tarts he ordered. Today was his birthday, and he didn't order a birthday cake, but only some egg tarts. So he opened the door. But after opening the door, he was stunned. The delivery boy was about his age, wearing a white T-shirt, jeans, blue and white sneakers, and had a handsome face. Jian Xiaoning actually knew this boy, but he didn't know his name. A month ago, when Jian Xiaoning went out with her boyfriend Zhu Yuliang, she met a few friends in the same circle. Some of them were friends with Zhu Yuliang, but Jian Xiaoning was not familiar with them. Only one person named Xiaohai was Zhu Yuliang's classmate, whom he had met once. Later, they went to a big food stall to eat barbecue, and the delivery boy was also there. They sat together while eating and chatted for a while. Jian Xiaoning knew that the 19-year-old boy was a freshman like her and was Xiaohai's buddy, but that was all. The…
My hair grows close to my scalp, and it is naturally wavy. It grows in a messy direction and is very difficult to manage, so I have never been able to find a suitable barber. Two years ago, I went to a barber shop by chance, and a strong and handsome guy helped me to manage my hair easily. From then on, I became dependent on him and developed a good friendship with him. I remember when I first walked into that barbershop, he stood up to greet me, very polite, and spoke like a mosquito. His white and tender face was revealed under his thick stubble, which formed a huge contrast with his thick arms and sexy chest muscles. But I liked him, so I let him cut my hair. I sat down and looked at him in the mirror, wondering, "Could he be gay, too? Could he be a strong man who looks masculine but is actually soft on the inside?" My feeling was soon confirmed. When he was cutting my hair, he deliberately put his strong legs close to me, and sometimes even pressed the bulge in the front of his jeans against my arm, which made me feel numb. He kept calling me "handsome guy"... Doesn't that mean he was very sure? He must be... the same kind of person. I was thinking about what to do with him, but he had already finished my haircut. When I looked at myself in the mirror, my eyes lit up. It was perfect! His craftsmanship was superb, which…
Comrade, once a common name, has now become a synonym for homosexuality. In the more than one year since I entered this circle, I have experienced so much. When I really experienced the taste of love, the sudden change made me panic. I know it is my fault, and it is my suspicion that made love leave me, but my tears and my calls can no longer win his heart back... I am an ordinary college student from a county town. Although the results of the college entrance examination were far from my ideal, I still required myself to do my best. Soon, I stood out among many of my peers and became a student leader. But I was born to be playful. I started surfing the Internet in my first year of high school. Now, surfing the Internet is still a "compulsory course" for me. The Internet has changed my life and also allowed me to enter the "gay" circle. Yu is the second friend I met. He has a family and a very cute son. He is mature, steady, and his smile is very attractive. Yu and I met last summer. We both went to the "gay chat room" on a certain website. That day, we chatted for a long time and got along very well. Later, Yu said he wanted to invite me out for dinner, and I agreed without thinking. About half an hour later, Yu came downstairs to my dormitory. The first time I saw Yu, I fell in love with him. He wore a…
You can't read this article. But I still say these words in my heart to you. Coming out to you is so simple and natural. But behind it is my difficult journey of self-awareness. Coming out to someone you once loved I have known you for 14 years. From a very early time, you have been my teacher, close friend, sister, and mother. We have always talked about everything. But I know that the fact that "Yingya may be a homosexual" is a forbidden area between us that we cannot step into. In your heart, you must have used various methods to blur this gap. 14 years have passed, and I finally mustered up the courage to tell you: I am a homosexual. Telling you means admitting to you that my feelings for you back then were love; it means telling you that I loved you. After confirming my orientation, I have always wanted to tell you so that you can understand the real me. This means a lot to me. But I have been hesitating. This may be too shocking news for you. Born in 1972, you are open-minded and have a good mind, but you have too little knowledge about homosexuality. I don't know what you think. I dare not touch that forbidden area, and I dare not confess to you many years later that I really loved you back then. That day we went to see Harry Potter 7 with your daughter. On the way back, the topic of homosexuality came up. I finally said, "Me too."…
I should be the most unlucky gay. I am only in my early 20s and a college student. I don’t understand why those gays are so fickle, like one-night stands, promiscuous sex, and all kinds of sexual behaviors with their gay friends, while I am so lucky and healthy. I am not a very promiscuous homosexual, and I had just started to get involved in the gay circle. I had sex with a gay college student who was studying in the same city as me, and as a result I contracted AIDS. When I was donating blood voluntarily, I received a blood test notice saying that I had AIDS. I didn't believe it at all at the time, and I secretly went to the most prestigious hospital in the city for a check-up. I hoped so much that I was lucky, but the test result still showed that I was infected with AIDS! The news was like a bolt from the blue. I was completely thrown on the brink of life and death. The thought of suicide suddenly sprouted from the bottom of my heart. I felt that life was playing a cruel joke on me, but I had to accept this joke. When I committed suicide, I was in great pain. Thinking of my parents, I just couldn't bring myself to end my life and say goodbye to this ruthless world. I could imagine that if I died, my parents would definitely not be able to live. I used to be their hope. I was always praised by my…
The world of love falls apart That day, we had been together for three years and one month. In the past, she would definitely be watching the news at around 7 o'clock every day, while I would be surfing the Internet. But that night, before the news was over, he said he was not feeling well and wanted to rest early. I have always been in poor health, but he has almost never felt unwell, and the twice-a-year physical examinations at his company showed that he was in good health. I obediently accompanied him to bed, turned on the bedside lamp on my side, and leaned against the bed to read. At around nine o'clock in the evening, he woke up and told me that he couldn't breathe. I persuaded him to go to the hospital, but he didn't want to, saying "It's okay, just sleep for a while", but I couldn't fall asleep because of my worry. At midnight, I found that he began to breathe heavily, and it was obviously very difficult, so I persuaded him to go to the hospital again. He was afraid that I would worry, so he said it was okay. At three o'clock in the morning, I turned on the light and saw that his lips were purple and his face was blue. I wanted to wake him up, but he didn't respond. I quickly called 120, then dressed him, and carried him, who weighed 150 pounds, on my small body of 100 pounds, from the third floor to the first floor. At…
It was late, but I still couldn't sleep. My chest was so stuffy that I could hardly breathe. At the beginning of this year, I had some physical symptoms, the most serious of which was blood in my stool, which was extremely painful. It was not until April that I had the courage to go to the hospital for treatment because I felt embarrassed to take off my pants in front of the doctors and nurses. After an electronic anorectal examination, the doctor found many problems and recommended that I have an operation. An hour after the preoperative examination, the blood test results came out, but the doctor refused to perform the operation on me because I was HIV positive. This result was not a bolt from the blue for me, but the looks from the doctors and nurses made me want to jump directly from the outpatient building (since this was a rapid test, the hospital was afraid that the test results would be inaccurate and asked me to go for a re-examination the next day. If the result was confirmed to be positive the next day, they would ask for my identity information). When I came out of the hospital, it was drizzling in Shenyang in April and the sky was gray, just like my mood. I called my two best friends and told them the test results. They said, "It may be a misdiagnosis. Go to the CDC tomorrow for an accurate test. Don't worry about it." "Your heart is not good. Don't think too much. Rapid…
After the farewell, my left arm felt weightless and my chest was empty. That night, I held gay in my arms. I know you are sleepy, a slight cold makes you sniff your nose constantly. In your sleep, you toss and turn like a frightened kitten, and I have to cover you with a blanket all night. It is the beginning of winter, and this city by the Yangtze River is very cold. I don't know how to make you feel at peace, I am at a loss. You approach me in my dreams, where is your warm place? You put your head on my shoulder, and finally breathed long and evenly, snoring occasionally. Yes, you caught a cold. I could only stay still, afraid of waking you up. In the darkness, I looked at you with a little love, and we had only met for less than ten hours. Is it just sympathy? I remembered the words that Pai Hsien-yung left on the title page of "Bad Sons": "Written to those children who wandered alone on the streets in the deepest darkness, with nowhere to go." We sipped the best Blue Mountain coffee under the dim lights of "Grinding Time". Now I like to add more milk and sugar. Once upon a time, I only drank pure black coffee, bitter, fragrant and lingering, the pure taste was just less rich. We talked about homosexual topics, he talked about his love history, I talked about my friendship. Yu Lai felt that love was just as strong when it was deep.…
